The Chinese zodiac has been used for thousands of years, and for the most part, they have remained the same. That’s why we’ve come up with this list of 5 prospective additions to the Chinese Zodiac:
Year of the Giant Panda
With the immense popularity of the Panda Cuddler job opening on social media, the Giant Panda is a shoo-in for the new Chinese horoscope. Who doesn’t want a cute, cuddly bear to be their zodiac sign? Besides, as that saying goes, it’s white, black and Asian all at the same time. So if you’re looking for a feel-good symbol of racial harmony, the Giant Panda’s a good bet.
Year of the Sea Urchin
Tough and thorny on the outside, but soft on the inside. That best describes the Sea Urchin—and it’s also the best description of a typical netizen. Like the Sea Urchin that has a bunch of spines to protect itself from predators, the netizen has all these defenses against any minor provocation, such as shaming the enemy of the day on Facebook.
However, even though those spines are dangerous, there’s a way for you to break through that shell. And once you do break that shell, its soft innards—the part served as uni sushi in Japanese restaurants—are a great treat.
Year of the Raccoon
Okay, we didn’t include this animal just because Rocket Raccoon is cool. In real life, raccoons are pretty smart; they have been described as clever, and have been able to retain solutions to problems for up to 3 years. So the next time a friend brings up something that happened way back in the past, he or she may just be born in the Year of the Raccoon. On the other hand, they make for polite commuters, such as this guy who went on the Toronto Subway.
Year of the Flowerhorn Fish
Do you have that friend that tries out each and every beauty craze out there—and sometimes ends up looking weird, as a result? Then they may be born in the Year of the Flowerhorn Fish.
Sure, the Flowerhorn has a beautiful coat that has made it an aquarium favorite. But with its ultra-pouty lips that can put Nicki Minaj’s puckers to shame, and its bump on the head that echoes the Japanese bagel head fad, it’s also evidence that you can have too much on your face at the same time.
Year of the African Gray ParrotBecause of all their squawking, parrots have gotten a bad rep. But that doesn’t mean that you should underestimate these birds—especially the African Gray variety. With these birds being able to pick up speech from humans after just a year, they’re definitely smarter than we’d think. So the next time you come across someone who just seems to be parroting what someone else has said, think again—even imitation is a skill in itself.